This was when many of you were but smiles and glints in your mothers’ eyes.

Naaalala mo pa ba noon na:
1. diyes lang ang pamasahe, kandong libre pa
2. ang babae lang ang may hikaw
3. ang preso lang ang may tattoo
4. si Erap at FPJ ay sa showbiz section lang ng dyaryo
nababasa
5. ang intindi mo ng LOL ay ULOL imbes na Laughing Out
Loud
6. ARCEGAS at ESCOLTA ang shoppingan sa bansa
7. diyes lang ang isang basong taho
8. at kailangan mong magdala ng sarili mong baso, kasi
wala pang plastic cups noon si manong na magtataho
9. chocnut, bukayo at kending vicks ang
pinag-gagastusan mo ng sinko mo
10. Sarsi with egg ang pampataba at star margarine, at
matamis na bao sa umaga.
11. nagkaka-kalyo ka dahil sa manual typewriter pa ang
ginagamit mo para sa school paper mo
12. kaya uso pa noon ang carbon paper
13. at tancho o superman ang pang-ayos mo ng buhok
14. KLIM ang tinitimpla ng nanay mo para sa’yo para
inumin mo bago matulog
15. nakakapag-grocery ka na 20 piso lang ang dala
16. anim na numero lang ang kailangan mong tandaan
para tawagan ang kaibigan mo
17. computer cards ang iyung tinutupi para maging
barilbarilan
18. singkwenta sentimos lang ang songhits
19. pango pa si Vilma
20. kay paeng yabut ka lang naniniwala pag-ukol sa
panahon ang balita
21. sinkwenta sentimos lang ang pa-gupit
22. pinagtatawanan ang kalbo
23. hindi uso ang gusot ang buhok at damit
24. nakakahiya kung nakalitaw ang halfslip ng babae,
ngayon nakadisplay pa ang panty at pusod
25. lalaki pa noon si ernie maceda at senator sonny
osmena
26. hostess pa ang tawag, ngayon GRO na
27. sa escolta ka namimili ng pamasko mo
28. payat na payattt ka pa noon
29. highway 54 pa noon at wala pang EDSA.
30. malago pa ang buhok mo
31. Jingle lang at Songhits nakakanta na.. ngayon naka
Kareoke pa.
32. $1.00 = 4 pesos
33. Si Dolphy matanda na, hanggang ngayon buhay pa at
nanganganak pa.
34. Sa Quiapo dati "praise the lord", ngayon "salaam
alekum" na.

Kung naaalala mo pa yan eh ..

tsk tsk MATANDA KA NA!!!
_________________
"I AM ROMAN CATHOLIC, SO I DO NOT EXPECT ‘HISTORY’ TO BE ANYTHING BUT A ‘LONG DEFEAT!’ — J.R.R. TOLKIEN

Mga guys naaalala mo pa ba sila ung mga una nating nakita sa TV at inaaabangan sila noon linggu-linggo ang TOKUSATSU SHOWS Super Sentai, Kamen Riders and everything like -> Bioman, Shaider, Maskman, Jiban, Janperson, Ultraman, Machineman!!!

eto ang pics:

Choudenshi Bioman (1984)

"kalaban"

HIKARI SENTAI MASKMAN (1987) ang pinaka favorite ko!

Take note of the Japanese-Tagalog name:

RED MASK- Takeru
(Our FAMOUS "MICHAEL JOE" in tagalog)
BLACK MASK- Kenta (Lenard in tagalog)
BLUE MASK- Akira (Adrian in tagalog)
YELLOW MASK- Haruka (Eloisa in Tagalog)
PINK MASK- Momoko (Mary Rose in tagalog)
COMMANDER SUGATA - DIREKTOR SAMUEL SUGATA
ASUKA RYOO/X1 MASK - ROY/X1 MASK
MIO/IAL - RIO/IYARU/LIRA

Mga kalaban nang Maskman:
EMPEROR ZEHBA - EMPERADOR SEBA
IGAM - IKAMU
FUUMIN - FUMIN
BARABA - DARGAN
OYOBUR - BULKO
ANAGMAS - PUNONG MINISTRONG ANAGMUS
OKELAMPA - OKERAMPA
THIEF KNIGHT KIROS - DARK KNIGHT KIROS

"kalaban"

SHOT BOMBER!!!! hehehe!

Jet Cannon

CHOUJIN SENTAI JETMAN (1991) isa rin to sa mga favorites ko.. isa sa mga childhood dreams ko nung mga panahong ‘yon ang maging pilot.

KYOURYU SENTAI ZYURANGER (1992) eto ung oiginal na Japanese version o MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS by Saban Ent. USA (1994-95)

Ultrazord

Pteraranger (zyuranger), Pink Ranger (powerrangers)

eto pa mga METAL HEROES:

UCHUU KEIJI SHAIDER "Space Sheriff Shaider" (1984) isa ito sa mga pinaka kilalang heroes nung 80’s-90’s..kabisado ko parin ang mga poses nya! whahaha! SHAIDAH!!!!

KIDOU KEIJI JIBAN "Mobile Detective Jiban" (1989) dinadubbed pa namin dati ng bestfriend ko ang opening theme nito.."jivan…jivan..eto tae nyo… hehehe!

TOKUSOU ROBO JANPERSON "Special Investigation Robo Janperson" (1993)

kauna-unahang Masked Rider (since 1971, dehins pa tayo buhay nyan ha pero meron akong VCD ng kamen rider)

Masked Rider BLACK (1987) ang my pamatay na Rider Punch at Rider Kick at sumasakay sa matulin na motor na may malaking mata..

Robert Akizuki

sa Other Heroes (HENSHIN)

si Machine Man naaalala nyo pa ba sya

MACHINEMAN (1984) sya yung ginagaya ni Gohan ng Dragonball bilang Sayan man.

Allen

Buknoy THE FIGHTING BALL..astig talaga sya! famatay!

si Guyferd kilala nyo pa ba sya

GUYFERD (1998) medyo sencored sya mag transform kasi nag-o-all the way nude!

Ryudo

eto naman ULTRAMAN

may nakakaalala pa ba rito

ULTRAMAN (1966) muka lang syang isda pero sya lang ang kilala kong higanteng superhero, at iconic sya sa Japan.

ULTRAMAN TIGA (1996, 30 yrs ago)

ULTRAMAN DYNA (1997) "with tiga" kabisado ko pa ang opening theme nito.."wong wong dyna! whehehe! hindi ko na alam i-spell!

hay ang sarap bumalik sa pagkabata..

What will make me leave the Philippines

Dear Fellow Filipino,

Good day to all of you! Before I begin my letter… just a disclaimer, for people who know me they know that I love the Philippines very much and I am not really one who rants and complaints to high heavens about what is happening to our country and does nothing about it, in fact, I feel that at my relatively young age of 27, I have done much service to the Philippines by setting up Pathways to Higher Education which has sent more than 500 poor but deserving students to college and AHON Foundation which has already built two public elementary school libraries that have benefitted more than 3,500 students. Yet, after seeing how events in our nation have transpired the past few weeks and talking with some friends, I feel the urge to share with you my own thoughts and feelings.

Over the weekend, we saw the completion of two major political alliances for this coming Senate Elections that has just began here in the Philippines . Now we have two political forces with familiar faces nonetheless on opposite sides of the fences. On one end, you have Tito Sotto and Tessie Aquino-Oreta who were two major stalwarts of the opposition and the FPJ Campaign in 2004 hobnobbing with the woman (Pres. GMA) whom they claimed to have cheated FPJ in the last Presidential Elections.On the other side of the fence, you see Manny Villar, the former house speaker who was actually responsible for impeaching Erap now part of the United Opposition who is led by no less than… Erap himself. Now if you don’t see anything wrong with this picture then you must be one of the many Filipinos who have accepted this very sad reality that there is indeed no permanent ideals that our government leaders stand up for but rather they just go where there self-interests can best be served. It is this kind of politics why I no longer wonder why good people like Ramon Magsaysay Awardee Mayor Jesse Robredo of Naga City or outstanding Bulacan Governor Josie Dela Cruz will find it hard or worse, never be elected to national positions.

It is with these in mind that I’d like to share with you what are events this coming May elections that will make me consider leaving the Philippines :

1.) If former COMELEC Commissioner Virgilio Garcillano of Hello Garci fame wins in his bid to become Congressman of Bukidnon…seeking to replace a good man no less in incumbent Cong. Neric Acosta… We would really be the laughing stock of the whole world if we allow a man with the reputation of Garci to be one of our so called “Honorable Gentlemen”.

2.) If Dancing Queen Tessie Aquino Oreta reclaims her seat at the Senate… I hope that all of us would still remember that dance that she did during the 2001 impeachment hearings after they voted to overrule the decision of then Chief Justice Davide… let us make sure that people like her never make it to the Senate again.

3.) If Richard Gomez becomes a senator… what does he know about making laws? We already have the likes of Bong Revilla and Lito Lapid in the Senate and their performance or lack of it would be reason enough not to elect another actor who has no prior experience in government to the distinguished halls of the Senate.

4.) If Gringo Honasan wins again…. have we not learned our lesson? I cannot believe that just because someone is charismatic then we will just elect him to become one of our senators despite the fact that he has time and again caused so much instability in our country… if we want a military junta similar to that of Thailand … then lets all vote for this guy….

5.) If Manny Pacquiao becomes Congressman of General Santos City… everybody loves Manny the Boxing Champ but Manny the Lawmaker? Lets be realistic here, Manny is our Hero alright but I think it takes more than just great boxing skills and a desire to serve to be able to make appropriate laws that would help uplift the lives of the many Filipinos who live in Poverty.

6.) If Lito Lapid wins for Mayor of Makati City… I don’t like Jojo Binay as well but Lito Lapid as city mayor of the country’s finance and business center?!?! And do you really think he is from Makati and has good plans for the city? The Arroyos asking someone like him to run just goes to show you how much love and concern this government has for our country.

7.) If Chavit Singson becomes a Senator, Illegal Gambling = Chavit… enough said.

Now if all of these 7 things happen during this coming elections then don’t be surprised if I decide to leave this country that I love dearly. Like I said during the first part of my letter, I feel that I have done much for this country but I think its time that Filipinos become more vigilant and critical in selecting our leaders for the sake of our future and the generations that will go beyond us. So I appeal to every Filipino who asks what can I actually do for my country… Choose and vote for the right people this coming elections, huwag na tayong magpaloko sa mga kandidatong maganda lang ang jingle o gwapo lang sa mga poster. Let us choose leaders who have a good track record for service and who are genuinely committed towards serving our country.

Manindigan naman tayong lahat para sa ating Kinabukasan at para sa Kapakanan ng ating Bayan!

Thank you very much for your time in reading this letter.

Sincerely,

Harvey S. Keh

Email: harveykeh@gmail.com

KAILANGANG MABASA ITO NG 80 MILLIONG PILIPINO !!! IPASA NYO NG IPASA !!!

"Does your testi complements you?"

The following are the best i’ve got! thanx alot!! you rock guys!!

ALLY Posted 19/1/2007 Che-che’s secrets revealed (Finally natapos man ang testi nga a year in a making) Having a very disciplinary dad, being a CAT Company Commander, going through Varsity trainings, attending countless Leadership Seminars in Western and Central Visayas, elected as 1 of the officers of Student Executive Council in a renown maritime school, (not mentioning his being multi president of different clubs and orgs) and living home alone at the very young age of 14…how disciplined would you imagine this guy would become? E tumakbo ka na rin kayang Congressman habang nag aartista o kaya nag papari? E linuma mo yung kasibihan na “you can’t serve 2 maters at a time” ah? Nakakapag toothbrush ka pa ba nyan? But in spite of all your co-curricular achievements you still have difficulties in expressing your self and many can’t believe sa lagay na yan e mahiyain ka parin. But this time let me help you with that… For those na hindi nakakaalam… obviously lahat… I met this comic geek 3 years ago sa isang bookstore and I didn’t expect that a person with such a nerdy hobbies would be look so so so cute!! Naks!! Isang bagsak!!.. Though medyo payat…no as in payat, e he has a super model curves naman… Naks ulit!! Dalawang bagsak!! Beyond his looks he consider his self as one of the nerds and one of the girls kaya pag me kaaway yan e lahat ng girls kakampi nya! His an heartrob beyond his knowing. Later on we discover that we really have lots in common na para kaming conjoined twins na pinag hiwalay. He’s like the male version of me except for 1 thing…masyado syang secretive and humble, he doesn’t let anyone (except ako! iba tayo e!) to know-at hindi nya gustong ipagmayabang kung sino sya talag. That’s why sometimes e misunderstood yan. Meron kasi yang philosophy na “when you know somebody’s name, he will probably turn to you when you call him” so he doesn’t share anything about his personality kasi he doesn’t want to be controlled by others…o di ba so lalim? So that’s why im so lucky na he opened up lahat yun sa’kin (but he didn’t get nude ha..yuck!) to the point na I know him better than my self and he gave me the power to get over him… gawin kaya kitang sex slave? Joke!! And speaking of sex, convincing din yung isa sa mga self portrait nyan sa private photo nya dito entitled “chastity, innocence, virginity” Nak! parang totoo? ibang klase din ang sex appeal nyang kambal ko, habulin nga yan e…ng mga bakla “gay magnet! E kung nag colboy nga siguro yan e malamang mayaman na yan ngaun… biro mo 12 anyos palang e sinisitsitan na ng mga bakla sa Recto? At hindi basta-basta, mga de kotse pa! Mabenta talaga ng mga buto-buto mo tol! That’s enough baka huling araw ko na sa mundo the next time magkita kami…basta all I know… matagal sya mag-orgasm hehehe! Many also who didn’t know that man of the many dreams din yan… he used to dream of becoming a chef during his elem days, to built a privet school, a scholarship foundation, privet church, and he’s a business minded too, he wants to have a productive farm, art/photo studio, getting into real estates, and have his own fashion line…o di ba ambisyoso? Sabi sayo mag congressman k nlang e. Pero lam nyo bang nakakaramdam din sya ng calling from above? Minsan I ask him bat di nya subukan hindi naman talaga nautical dream nya, sabi nya “he’s still answering my prayers naman kahit di ako mag pari” another 1 of his words of wisdom again? Pero ok lang sayang din naman ang rasa nya kung mag papari sya…aso? Hehehe! pero hindi rin malayong matupad nya’ng mga ambisyon nya, pano kasi saksakan yan ng kuripot, once a week lang yan nagpapa- 24 hrs unli! Nag e-expire pa nang di nagagamit! May unforgettable experience kasi yan sa pag tetext. Akalain mo ba namang mag stalker sya sa girl na almost 10yrs na sya in love? Ganon sya katindi at ganon din ka torpe ma in love. Ok and it goes well na sana ang diskate nya sa girl, nag kamabutihan sila for almost half a year until he finally confess that he’s not what he said he is (“Micheal” pa daw? Feeling artista guagamit ng sceen name?) So as expected na-hurt yung girl and sobrang nagalit sa kanya kaya hindi na sya nagpakilala kung sino sya talaga… pero over sa drama ang lolo till now sobrang mahal nya parin daw yung girl kahit my family na to. O di ba pang MMK? Pero hindi naman sya ganon katanga sa pag dating sa girls. Nako e ang landi-landi nga nyan e kung babae lng yan?… ewan ko nalang! E halos every week kung magpakilala sya sakin ng girl. Gentleman nga ang kirpot naman! Yung mga malaladi nya ring “kabit” lagging handa gumastos! Hay nko cute kasi e! sana man lang kahit isa dun sa mga yun maliban sakin my sineryoso ka… ask ko lang siniryoso mo ba ko? If not, hope I will be the last on your Fling List ok? And speakin of did I already mention na naging kami months before he graduate? Pero kahit ganun yan wala yang sinasaktan…sa ibang usapan sigro meron! Hehehe! Nako mas mahaba pa yang kwento wag nalang! But right after ng graduation nila sa lahat ng naging bf ko sya lang ang bukod tangi na nakipag break sakin…ang kapal mo talaga! Pero tanggap ko naman na hindi na kami magkikita after grad kaya nya ginawa yon. As I remember sinabi nya rin nga palang gusto nya nang magka-baby by the age of 20 para daw by 40 e makalaro nya pa anak nya ng basketball, pano yan? E 21 ka na by august 8 di ba? Pag wala ka parin nahanap by this august just call me lagi naman akong prepare hehehe e maganda naman ang lahi amin di ba? Hahaha! hay nko ang haba na nito… just wanna tell you na sobrang miss kna ng banda…miss na namin mga luto mo and sawa na kami sa mga survivor na mga food! at ang gulo-gulo na ng apartment! Huhuhu! May melody na rin pala yung mga poems na sinulat mo, kung gusto marinig e mag pakita ka muna samen!! Hehehe! Lam mo bang since na wala ka hindi na sila gumigimick? Wala na raw kasing chick magnet! And wala narin silang ibubugaw pag wala na kaming pera! Hahaha! Basta thanks for every thing na shi-nare mo, you inspire us ang dami talagang naituro samin… just always have confidence in every thing you do, remember what we said “you already have the assets you just lack of gusts”. P.S. Iregret the moment that I let you go… What ever you said tinamaan talaga ako… Even though you’re so perfect for me… Kahit fling lang talaga yon… Ill just wait…just like what you did for her… Maybe that’s what true love is… Anyway I just hope this will help… Warning: Don’t ever show your face to us na hindi napopost tong testi na’to! This will help others to understand you. Delete

       “Santa’s Trip”

"Yes baby, there is Santa Claus.”

            It is truly heartwarming to know that millions of people around the world believe in Santa. Sure, most are under four feet tall, but still it’s amazing so many believe in the big guy in the red suit. Consider the following:

            Around the globe, today, live approximately two billion children (persons under 18). Santa doesn’t visit all of them of course. Subtracting the number of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist children reduces Santa’s Christmas Eve workload to 15 percent of the total, or 378 million children (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, presuming that there at lease one good child in each home, Santa must visit about 108 million homes.

            Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels from east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. That means that at each household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000^th of a second to park his sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh, and get on to the next house.

            For purposes of our calculations, we will assume that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false). We’re talking about trip of 0.78 miles per household; total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. To cover that ground in 31 hours, Santa’s sleigh moves at 650 miles per second-3,000 times the speed of sound. By comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

            The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child get nothing more than a medium-size Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh must carry over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. In air, even granting that the “flying” reindeer could pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with a mere eight or nine of them-Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of Queen Elizabeth (the ship not the monarch). Six hundred thousand tons of traveling at 650 miles second creates enormous air resistance-this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14 .3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of second, or right about the time Santa reach the fifth house on his trip.

            Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from the dead stop to 650 miles per second in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal force of 17,000 g’s. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Where to take it from here…

Considering all this, it’s amazing that some children (and even a few adults) have no problem believing in Santa. By comparison, the story of the little baby in the manger is relatively easy to believe. The life of Jesus Christ is a fact, recorded not only by biblical writers but secular historian as well. Some historian declare that there is more evidence

For the birth, death, and resurrection of Christ than there is evidence that Julius Cesar ever live at all.

            Even in the face of the written testimony of eyewitnesses, many people refuse to believe in Jesus. They consider him nothing more than a myth. But for those willing to believe with childlike faith, Jesus promises an inheritance of the kingdom of God (Mark 10:14).

            After all Christmas is not just special, it’s Holy…

MERRY CHRISTSMAS!!!

Good-Bye Cruel World!

Napapadalas ang pagbabasa ng tabloid nitong mga nakaraang araw. At napansin kong bestseller pala ang mga article tungkol sa suicide. Ang prolema nga lang, tila yata masyado pang amateur ang maraming tao sa pagsasagawa ng grand entrance nila sa langit…o sa ibaba nito. Kaya naisip kong pagtuunan ito ng pansin para sa kapakanan ng mga nagbabalak. Heto ang aking tips para sa ligtas, maginhawa, at di malilimutang pamamaalam sa mundo:

1. Bago ang lahat, alamin muna ang tamang dahilan sa pagsu-suicide. Kung ang problema mo ay dahil lang naman sa wala kang pera o iniwanan ka ng minamahal mo, hindi ka dapat magpatiwakal. Ang mundo ay tambak ng mga taong pwede mong mahalin, at ang pera naman ay pwede mong kitain, kaya hindi ka dapat mawalan ng pag-asa. Ang pagkitil sa sariling buhay ay karapaatan lamang  ng mga taong gumagamit ng cellphone at nakikipagkwentuhan sa loob ng sinhan.
2. Kung desidido ka na sa gagawin mo at sa tingin mo ay meron kang tamang dahilan para gawin ito, ang susunod mong hakbang ay ang pagpili ng paraan ng pagpapakamatay. Ang mga popular na paraan ay ang pagbibigti, pag baril sa ulo (o sa puso pag wala ka nang ulo pero buhay ka pa rin), at paglalaslas ng pulso. Ang mga jologs na paraan naman ay ang pagtalon sa mataas na gusali, pagpapasagasa sa EDSA, at pagpigil ng hininga. Tandaan na maari ka pang mabuhay pag nagkamali ka sa pagsasagawa ng mga nabanggit, kaya pumili lamang ng isa na hiyang sa’yo. Bukod d’yan, marami rin sa mga paraan na ito ang makalat at nakakapangit. Dyahe naman kung pagtitinginan ng mga tao ang mukha mo sa ataul muka kang dehydrated na langaw.
3. Sumulat ng suicide note. Eto ang exciting. Ditto pwede mong sisihin lahat ng tao, at wala silang magagawa. Sabihin mo na hindi mo gustong tapusin ang iyong buhay kaso lang bad trip sila lahat. Pero ‘wag ding kalimutang humingi ng tawad sabandang huli para mas cool pag ginawang pelikula ni Carlo J, Caparas ang buhay mo. At tandaan , importante ang suicide note para malaman ng mga tao na nagpakamatay ka at hindi na-murder. Sa ganitong paraan maiiwasanng PNP ang pagkuha sa kalye ng kahit sinong tambay bilang suspect.
4. Pumili ng theme song. Banggitin ang iyong special request sa suicide note. Ipagbilin na patugtugin ito sa prusisyon ng iyong libing. Iwasan ang mga kanta ng Salbakutah. Dapat medyo mellow at meaningful…tulad ng Sexbomb.
5. Isulat nang maayaos ang suicide note. Print. Iwasang magbura. Gumamit ng scented stationary at #1 Monggol Pencil. Lagdaan. Huwag gumamit ng sticker. Ilagay ang suicide note sa lugar na madaling makita. Idikit sa noo.
6. planuhin ang isusuot. Isang beses ka lang mamamatay, kaya dapat memorable ang get-up. Pumili ng telang hindi umuurong at makati sa katawan. Magbaon ng dalawang pares pamalit pag pinawisan ka.
7. Kumuha ng dekalidad na ataul. Maganda ang kulay puti dahil malamig at kumportable kahit tag-init. Huwag magtipid. Mas makakamura kung bibili ng cable-ready, kesa magpapalit pa balang araw.
8. Pumili ng magandang pwesto sa sementeryo. Ang puntod ng mga taong ipinanganak sa year of the Rat. Dragon, Rabbit, Snake, Tiger, Chiken, Pork, at Beef ay dapat nakaharap sa Fiesta Canival. Ang mga ipinanganak sa ibang taon ay dapat i-cremate at gawing foot powder, para gumaan ang pasok ng pera.
9. Itaon ang libing sa unang dalawang linggo ng buwan, o di kay’y sa huling dalawang linggo ng buwan para gumaan ng pasok ng pera.
10. Kung meron ka nang NBI at police clearance, affidavit of loss, voter’s ID, cedula, promissory note, original copy of birth certificate, at urine sample, pwede mo nang isagawa ang kalugod-lugod na gawain. Siguraduhin lang na hindi ka mababalita sa tabloid, katabi ng mga article tungkol sa kabayong my tatlong ulo, at sirenang namataan sa Manila Bay. Para gumaan ang pasok ng pera.

It’s hard to get away with anything in the light, that’s why so many people love the darkness (John 3:19).

Young soldier and his commanding officer got on a train together. The only available seats were across from an attractive young lady who was traveling with her grandmother. As the four engage in conversation, the young soldier and the young lady kept eying one another. There was an obvious mutual attraction.

Suddenly the train went into a tunnel, sending the train car into darkness. Immediately two sounds were heard: the smack of a kiss followed by the whack of a slap across someone’s face.

The grandmother thought, “I can’t believe he kissed my granddaughter, but I’m glad she gave him the slap he deserved”.

The commanding officer thought, “I don’t blame the boy for kissing the girl, but it’s a shame that she missed him and hit me instead”.

The young girl thought, “I’m glad he kissed me, but I wish my grandmother hadn’t slap him for doing it”.

And as the train broke into the sunlight, the soldier couldn’t help but smile. He managed to kiss a pretty girl and slap his commanding officer and get away with both!

nce upon a time a man set out to change the world. Before long he discovered that the world was far too big for one person to change. So he decided to change his country. Crooked politicians special interest groups unfortunately thwarted his efforts, so he decided to change his neighborhood. But his neighbors simply closed their doors and shut their windows, so he decided to change his family. Instead of changing, his children rebelled and his wife threatened a divorce, and things only got worse.

Finally, the man decided to change himself.

And when he did that, he changed the world.

Where to take it from here…

Change starts with you.

“Where’s the Justice?”

(Ayon sa paboritong libro ni Bob Ong)

Ibinalik na pala ang Superfriends sa TV, pero Justice League na sila ngayon. At bawas na sila. Marami nang superheroes ang nawala. Laid-off. Kung kelan mas kailangan ng mundo ng mga tagapagligtas. Hindi ko gusto ang Justice league. Lalo na ang X-men. Solid ako sa Superfriends. Walang iwanan.

         
  Ang alam ko kasi dati , Caucasian si Green Lantern. Pero sa Justice League, African-American na s’ya. Ano ‘yun lokohan? Pwede bang maging itim ang dating puti? Sino ang sususnod na magpapalit ng lahi at magkakakulay, si Benjamin Franklin?

            Nakasama din pala sa cast si Hawkgirl. Pero nasaan na si Hawkman? Inilagay na ba sa arrozcaldo? Kaya lang naman nagkaroon ng Hawkgirl e dahil kay Hawkman. Sumama na ba si Hawkman kay Robin na isa pa ring missing in action? Sino na lang ang magbibihgay ng mga bagong damit, relo, at sapatos kay Batman nagyong wala na si Robin? At sino ang nag-vote off kay Aquaman? Sino pa ang aasahan natin ngayon na magliligtas sa mga hipon na pinagsasamantalahan ng mga balyena? Nasaan na ang Wonder Twins? Ano na ang nangyari kay Apache Chief? At higit sa lahat, bakit nila pinaalis sa grupo ang kaisa-isang Asian superhero na hindi ko alam ang pangalan?! Nasaan ang justice at equality doon???

            Bubuo lang sila ng grupo ng mga best of the best, sablay pa! Pero kung sa bagay, mahirap nga ‘yon. Dahil mismong yung mga imaginary super humans na ginawa nila e may problema. Tingnan mo: bakit kailangan nila ng kapa? Bakit nasa labas ang brief nila? At anak naman ng tiyanak, bakit hindi sila guamamit ng brief na ayos pa ang garter para hindi na nila ito siturunan?

            ‘yan ang maga western superheroes na napansin yata at iniwasan na ng mga Hapon nang sila naman ang gumawa ng mga kathang-isip na tagapag ligtas. Sa una pa lang, inisip na nila na kung magta-trabaho ang kanilang superheroes bilang isang grupo, importanteng meron silang prescribed uniform. Pantay-pantay sila, walang magsusuot ng kapa at aastang hari tulad ni Superman. Walang may bitbit na sidekick tulad ng Robin ni Batman. Walang amoy asin tulad ni Aquaman. At walang Mr. & Mrs. Na kakain ng paychek tulad nina Hawkgirl at Hawkman.

            Nung una e puro nakaitim lang at parang laging makikipag libing ang mga Japanese superheroes, pero naisip yata nila na kakailangnin ng bawat isa ang pangalan. At magkakakila-kilala lang sila sa ilalim ng uniform at maskara (o helmet) kung meron silang palatandaan sa kasuotan. Doon nila naisip na mag-color coding: red, green, blue, yellow, at pink. Eureka! Two-birds in one stone. May sarili na silang identity dahil sa kulay, may sarili pa silang pangalan. Dadagdagan nalang nila  ng “noun” nag “color”, superhero na sila. Halimbawa: Blue Lion, Pink Ranger, Yellow 4, Red Horse, at green joke. Sa ganitong paraan, maiiwasan nila ang mga limitado at gasgas na pangalan na mabubuo sa mga salitang Super, Wonder, Mighty, Man, Woman, Girl, Boy, at Dog, na paborito naman ng mga kanlurang bansa.

             Pero hindi pa tapos! Dahil di tulad ng mga puti, may value-added service lagi ang mga Hapon. Sa oras ng matinding pangangailangan, pwedeng magsama-sama ang limang super heroes para bumuo ng isang higanteng robot na kayang pumuksa ng mga higanteng kuto, linta, bagoong, biskwit, at alikabok. Mismo. Hindi lang yan, dahil bago sila makipag-laban, lagi silang may formation. Haharap sila sa camera para sa ritual na group photo opportunity, parang pang-class picture. Alam na nila kung sino ang pupwesto sa kanan, kaliwa, gitna, taas, at baba, at kung sino ang mag I-split, sisipa, tatalon, susuntok, at susungayan sa ulo. Systematic very Organized. At kahit sa mga animé mas okay ang costume nila Eugene na parang lagging a-attend ng rave party, kesa kila Superman na parang lagging a-attend ng aerobics class.

            Walng-wala ang mga ‘Kano sa imahinasyon ng mga Hapon. Tingnan mo na lang si Astroboy. Sabihin mo-SINO-sa buong kasaysayanng Amerika-ang superhero na may machine gun sa Pwet? Wala. Kung may kinalaman ito sa trauma nga mga Hapon noong Ikalawang Digmaang Pandaigdig e hindi ko alam, pero sigurado akong hindi ko ipagpapalit si Astroboy sa sandosenang Justice League. Kung magiging superhero ako gusto ko maging tulad n’ya. At kung kakapusin man ako ng lakas, papanoorin ko lang ang mga kalaban ko ng possessed na video ni Sadako, na magiging dahilan ng kamatayan nila pagkalipas ng isang linggo!….MUWHA..AH..AH..AH! HIYA HA..Ha..ha..ha!